AllmysteryNavigation
Menschen Wissenschaft Politik Mystery Kriminalfälle Spiritualität Verschwörungen Technologie Ufologie Natur Umfragen Unterhaltung
weitere Rubriken
PhilosophieTräumeOrteEsoterikLiteraturAstronomieHelpdeskGruppenGamingFilmeMusikClashVerbesserungenAllmysteryEnglish
Diskussions-Übersichten
BesuchtTeilgenommenAlleNeueGeschlossenLesenswertSchlüsselwörter
Schiebe oft benutzte Tabs in die Navigationsleiste (zurücksetzen).

Survival guide

3 Beiträge ▪ Schlüsselwörter: zombie guide ▪ Abonnieren: Feed E-Mail
Seite 1 von 1
Puschelhasi Diskussionsleiter
ehemaliges Mitglied

Link kopieren
Lesezeichen setzen

Survival guide

28.05.2012 um 22:41
1 What to do During an Outbreak
1.1 Look For Frank West
1.2 Look For Bill, Francis, and Louis (and Zoey for other reasons)
1.3 Look for the S.T.A.R.S. Team
1.4 Look for anyone carrying a Zombie Survival Guide Handbook
2 What is a Zombie?
3 Evaluating A Zombie
3.1 Zombie Psychology
3.2 Method of Transmission
3.3 Intelligence Level
4 Preparation
4.1 Things To Consider
4.2 Weapon Options
4.3 Zombie Survival Kit
5 How You Should Move
5.1 Escape Strategy
5.2 Sit Tight and Wait it out
6 The Zombie Survival Group
6.1 Where And Who Are They?
7 Constructing A Zombie-Proof Shelter
7.1 Theory
7.2 Shelter Types
7.3 Shelter Construction
7.3.1 Materials
7.3.2 Steps
7.4 Operation
7.5 Closing
7.6 Quotes
8 Levels of Outbreak
9 Outbreak Causes
9.1 Government Labs
9.2 Hospitals
9.3 Voodoo Curse
9.4 Indian Graveyards
9.5 Masturbation
9.6 The Solanum Virus
9.7 Experimental Chemicals or Medicines
9.8 Vengeance
9.9 The Venus Probe
9.10 The Democrats
9.11 Absolutely no reason whatsoever
10 Zombie Cloud Hotspots
10.1 Zombie Suppression Techniques
10.2 Escaping the Cloud
10.3 In Case of Death
10.4 Do Not
11 Surviving the Fallout
11.1 Living Conditions
11.2 Survival Methods
11.3 Repopulating The Human Race
12 How To Survive The Zombie Apocalypse
12.1 Last Resorts
13 Further Reading
14 External links
editWhat to do During an Outbreak

Here are the two best options if these opitions fail we suggest you read the rest of this article.
TIP: We suggest You to not trust anybody while in a Zombie outbreak, but, do whatever you want.

If you do not have the proper equipment to handle an outbreak, evacuation may be the safest option
editLook For Frank West
Look for photojournalist Frank West. He should be carrying a camera or Dr Barnaby and about 10 weapons depending how far through the game he is, and dressed in either a brown suit and loafers or something completely stupid, like gym shorts and a Lego man helmet. If you can find Frank, stay with him and you will survive the outbreak, unless Frank dies from 2 minutes of not having food.
editLook For Bill, Francis, and Louis (and Zoey for other reasons)
Enough said. It is guaranteed they will eliminate any zombie-related threat. They will pretty much survive any zombie related threat. But be warned, the rescue that they find always draws in a horde of zombies and never lasts long. You need Zoey because zombie pussy just ain't enough.
editLook for the S.T.A.R.S. Team
Nuff said. Just watch out not to run out of Green Herbs. Or else.

edit Look for anyone carrying a Zombie Survival Guide Handbook
Just be mindful of the constant 'I KNEW THIS WAS COMING!' crazy rants that this person is most likely to splew out.
editWhat is a Zombie?

There are multiple definitions of the word zombie. The dictionary defines zombie as "an animated corpse that feeds on living flesh." Other sources define zombie as "One who moves or acts as if in a daze" or "a member of Congress" or "a Voodoo snake god." While snake gods are interesting, this how-to article will deal with only the first and second definitions of zombie. While Chavs were once thought to be zombies it has been recently proven that it is not the case. It would be an insult to zombies if they were even contemplated to be in the same category as Chavs. Such contemplators were subsequently eaten.
editEvaluating A Zombie


Some Zombies are more vulnerable to fire than others. The easiest and fastest way to check is a simple test with a burning stick. Make sure to comply with safety guidelines when dealing with fire.
There are a plethora of zombie varieties and each type has different strengths and weaknesses you should be aware of should you want to live. It is rare for any two zombie invasions to be exactly the same so even if you have survived one, do not arrogantly assume a second will be the same. The key here is observation. Around 80 to 90 percent of all zombie invasions are preceded by the scattered appearance of lone zombies. It is extremely rare for a whole horde to appear without warning. These zombie forerunners are your chance to study the enemy. Remember that the media will always fail to take the threat seriously and will downplay the appearances as some freaky disease, alien invasion, Muslim terrorism, illegal immigration, food poisoning, a militant gay pride group, democrats, etc. DO NOT LOWER YOUR GUARD. Gather some friends, check the weaponry section below, and seek lone zombies in dark, creepy areas.
editZombie Psychology
Main article: Zombie Types
There are two main brands of zombie in respect to how they gather. Some varieties gather in great hordes and move down the streets blatantly. The other option is zombies who are generally found alone or in small groups and hide inside buildings.
Horde zombies are dangerous to combat effectively. They require much more potent weaponry to approach with confidence, but are easier to flee and avoid. Horde zombies tend to be less intelligent than the more hermit like breeds. Most zombies move slowly, with awkward gaits, but this is especially true of hordes. Fast zombies are unable to remain in a cohesive horde and quickly break apart into hunter packs. Hordes should not be faced aggressively. Only attack with a solid escape plan in place, and even then only attack if you have massive weaponry. The recommended tactic is to use tall buildings and any news reports that manages to broadcast during the invasion to keep tabs on the horde's location. However, if you notice a piece of flesh fall off the anchorperson's face, ignore anything they have to say about how to avoid the zombies. Stay ahead of the horde and flee quickly. Stay out of the zombies' sight and leave some space between you and them. Most hordes include a few zombies wandering off a bit on their own. These loners may raise an alarm before you can deal with them, drawing the horde to you. When fleeing a horde, silence is key; favor melee weapons and fleeing to conventional combat. If you can get away from the city, do not stop in the suburbs. Though initially zombie free, suburbs will draw smaller packs from the main zombie horde, and occasionally have zombified animals or more diverse -often physically superior- zombies holed up in houses, farms, etc. You must choose from two final destinations: government shelters and the wilderness, although a reinforced refugee camp may be tempting, the horde will always reach it sooner or later. Government shelters have the advantage of armored exteriors, food stores, and military defense...however, if the horde seems like it may succeed in wiping out civilization or they are the reason that the zombie outbreak occurred in the first place,they are a poor choice, especially given recent budget cuts. To limit infiltration points, such bases have few entrances, and thus escaping a massed zombie attack will be impossible. The wilderness is not very habitable to zombies and is only rarely invaded. The exception to this rule is swampland which should be circumvented if encountered. Zombies' slow gaits and clumsy movements make it especially hard for them to travel over unpaved ground. They ARE easy prey for most predators, but this results in zombified animals. However, in the wilderness, it is easier for fungi and bacteria to break the zombies down. The only problem with a wilderness destination is YOUR ability to survive there. Print off a wilderness survival guide before fleeing and look for high ground.

An example of a fat zombie randomly exploding as usual.
While they move with a slower gait than normal Horde Zombies, Fat Zombies are a formidable foe. For some reason unknown to science today (perhaps transition of fat into muscle from whatever made them a zombie.), the transition from "Fat Person" to "Fat Zombie" gives super strength and an unchallenged resistance to bullets and rockets. In some cases they have been known to explode when shot, causing anyone in a large radius around them to be burned with acid, so it's best to kill them from a range. You had best hope to some kind of deity that when you encounter Fat Zombies that you're either a good distance away and/or you have some team-mates with you. At the beginning of the Zombie Outbreak automatically assess your team and flag the most useless member - keep this member with you at all times because he/she are an invaluable tool against Fat Zombies. Even though the Zombification changes their strength, the Fat Zombie's gluttony stays exactly the same so if you were to throw this team-member at them, they will stop following you and gorge. When you are a reasonable distance away from a Fat Zombie, get your team to focus fire on that one zombie Aim for the legs first, as it will force the fatty to crawl. Conventional Zombie killing tactics are not as effective against fat zombies. To render one to an almost completely harmless state, you must shoot off all extremities - Arms, Legs and Head. Suggested weapons are powerful sniper rifles, rockets and chainsaws. Please note that if you are close enough to use a chainsaw, you are likely about to die so think happy thoughts.
Grue Zombies, grues who have (somehow) died and became zombies. There is really no way to kill grue zombies unless you have Chuck Norris or can successfully pull off the shoop da whoop.
Camper zombies, zombies who hide and wait for prey, are the other common type. Campers hide in darkened corridors, side rooms, and even in the drywall. They prefer to wait for their prey to come near and then burst out and seize the victim. When dealing with campers, a smart survivor favors lighter weaponry that can be used safely at short range. One very effective but rarely used tactic is to keep a dog with you. Zombies are surprisingly adept at hiding despite their dim wits, but canines easily detect the rotting odor that emanates from their hiding places. When facing camper zombies, move slowly and keep a sharp eye on your surroundings for hints of an upcoming attack. Clues include a rank smell, eerie music, and long periods without zombies. If traveling in a group it's not a bad idea to hole up in a room for rest as long as two people are awake at all times to ensure the guard does not fall asleep. Open areas and wall hack cheats are your friends when facing campers. Do not split up to look for this type of zombie, as it is almost guaranteed the least important members of your group will be taken by the zombie and added to its ranks.
Fast Zombies are some of your most dreaded enemies when facing legions of the undead. Fast Zombies can vary in many ways, but the main item is that their entire physique (i.e. rotting of fat, skin, veins, and organs.) is morphed to allow them to strike fast. The majority of fast zombies have been found to have been overzealous gym instructors and annoying co-workers who won't let go of the "Can do attitude" even post-mortem. Most of the time the Fast Zombies are very skinny as opposed to their horde friends and as a consequence are much less resistant. Their most prized weapon is surprise. Thee best way to take out a Fast Zombie is by rapid-fire or wide area explosives. Shotguns are very useful because if you don't hit them while they're bearing down on you (well if you cannot hit something with a shotgun then you probably deserve to be a zombie anyway) then you still have a very heavy thing to hit them with.
Remember, when you see a cloud of zombies which seems too much of a simple target, it probably is. Keep a loaded shotgun nearby, and watch the rooftops - Most of the time the horde is very one minded following the "kill-eat-move on to the next guys" mantra, but sometimes "Smart Zombies" co-ordinate them so the Fast Zombies and the Horde Zombies work together. Please see below for advice on Smart Zombies.
Elvis Impersonator Zombies These are usually the rarest, if not the most entertaining variety of undead you may encounter. They can be easily identified by their signature hairdo, glittery pretentious suits, and trademark lurching walk which they plagiarized from Elvis. Which isn't really even a walk, since they don't actually get anywhere. The best place to avoid this zombie is anywhere but Las Vegas or Canadian Las Vegas.
When you know a Smart Zombie is around, the best thing you can do is avoid him at all costs. Smart Zombies have the ability to set up and carry out plans. If there's one around, then there are likely several zombies gathering. Smart Zombies are a rare type.
Sewer Zombies like to spend all their time in sewers and in drain areas, they are afraid of light so taking a flashlight is a good idea. A better idea is to just avoid sewers. As a matter of fact, you should avoid all places with low visibility and no cover, as this means the zombies darker coloration and slow movement speed will not make much of a difference, whereas a well lit, cluttered area will often make zombies stumble about opening them to fire..
Lady Zombies are exactly what they sound like. Every necrophiliacs nightmare, they are girl zombies. But surprisingly, they're not that different from the live ones, they still moan and groan about the men never taking them anywhere.
The Zombie.....Chuck Norris!!!, this is the most dangerous zombie ever. Some of the zombie abilities he is theorized to possess include infecting people by burping on them, complete cellular regeneration (means he can't be killed. Ever.), shooting lasers from his and every other zombies left eye, shooting lava from his and every other zombies right eye and round house kicking holes in the space-time continuum. Luckily, the Zombie Chuck Norris made mistake early by approach Zombie Hunter Tony Jaa who not only smash its brain but also every single piece of bone in single blow (along with all bystanders, undead or not).
Animal Zombies Depend on your luck. A zombie snail is most common but they're totally harmless. Other kind of animal zombie do exist. Some of these are "dog" zombies. If a zombie gets to be this big, then it's lethal. However, since much of it's muscle has degraded by then, it won't be able to catch you. (THANK GOD!!!) If a CHEETAH zombie attacks you, even without it's degraded muscle, then you're fucking screwed.
'Peanut zombies'
A.K.A.The Terrors of the junkyard,these vermicious brutes Wander the junkyards, in poorly built helies, or controlling guns. Avoid these brutes, they have a leader, Project #295. He has two dual glocks, and is not afraid to use it.beware the ultimate power!Since the zombies corrupted the rest of the info, i think you should find out more about these peanut zombies.
editMethod of Transmission
In order to get infected by a zombie, you need to be bitten, or bite one of them, although I have no idea why you would ever want to. The saliva and blood of a zombie have the potential to infect a person and eventually turn them, so keep your mouth shut if you're the dumbass using a chainsaw. To be honest I prefer a good old fashioned flamethrower to burn those sons a bitches where they stand.
editIntelligence Level
Zombies are as a rule dumb as hell (excluding the rare Smart Zombie), especially if you live in the Deep South. There are rare exceptions in which zombies learn not to walk on land mines or that electrocution will put them down for good. If you encounter these zombies, then pray to God you took Garry Kasparov (or better yet, Deep Blue) into your hideout, you're going to need someone smart to stay alive. Plus, if you like getting your ass beat at chess, bonus!
editPreparation

Preparation is essential for surviving a Zombie Outbreak. Note: Being prepared for a Zombie Outbreak is sometimes referred to as having a 'Zombie Plan' write that down so when someone asks you if you have a 'Zombie Plan' you don't look like a total NOOB!!!
“Zombie Plan, what is a Zombie Plan”
~ Obvious NOOB on Zombie plans
“I don't have a zombie plan, I have 37 different zombie plans”
~ Sarge on Excellent zombie preparation
“Wow Sarge 37, I know i don't normally compliment you sir but that's preparation”
~ Private Grif on Sarge
“Shut up you! 36 of those 37 involve using your dead carcass as a distraction or bait... and the last one i knowingly infect myself with the zombie virus just so i can feed on you flesh”
~ Sarge on Grif's place in his 'Zombie Plans'
Outlined below are the steps that should be followed to prepare for a potential zombie attack:
editThings To Consider
The type of Zombie You Face
Weaponry
Grab some pills and health packs
Your Placement/Movement
Nearness to a source of fire
editWeapon Options
Chainsaw- Most of all Resident Evil or horror films and countless Hollywood scenes show the awesome power of the chainsaw. As cool as it is though, it ranks very low on the practical zombie-killing weapon list. The lightest chainsaw recorded was 25 pounds and it won't do you very good carrying that VERY heavy object around, while running from a crowd of pale-skinned freaks intent on eating you. Will it? Didn't think so. Chainsaws are freakin' hard to control, so you might be trying to behead a zombie but you can't guarantee it won't turn on you and slice your own damn head off in the process. In addition, once the fuel runs out, it's as useful as a giant spoon. Finally, if you do manage to get used to the weight and how to kill zombies with it, it will only do good against 1-to-8 zombies, not a WHOLE FUCKING SWARM, because as soon as you use it on those few 8 zombies, the roar will attract A LOT of zombies from miles around, rendering the chainsaw a veritable lunch bell. Unless you can do an indefinite spinning attack with your chainsaw. Also Chainsaws need gas, imagine how much it costs to kill only 12 zombies?
Lawn Mower- All the same problems as Chainsaw, with even greater problems. You know how hard one of those things are to lift, let alone to a position that the blades can even do their work. Also, it is not made to be lifted up into the air, so even if you can lift the mower, it will not stay up there for long. It might of looked cool in Brain Dead, it will never work.

Slingshot- It wouldn't be the wisest of choices. Using it against a zombie will only alert it to your presence, stupid. Unless you throw a bomb with it.
Edged Weapons- Imagine using a sword to kill a crowd of zombies and you stab some zombie through the skull in the brain. Now imagine you turn to the zombie behind you to do the same, only to realize that it's stuck on the first zombie that you stabbed and you can't seem to get it back.......not a pretty picture, is it? So use one without a serrated edge. Unless you are a skilled fencer, this is an inadvisable choice.
Katana Meant to slice a zombies head clean off there shoulders rather then trying to stab them to death. Cuts through dead (And live people alike) like a hot knife through butter, don't forget to keep your blade clean by spinning it in your hand and fanning the blood everywhere like a bad ass.
Guns-
Pistol: short range, small clip, small bullet, only use on small groups, otherwise you are dead (or undead).
Sub-machine gun: decent gun against zombies, it can be useful against large groups of Horde Zombies. sprays a lot of bullets at a high rate of fire but ammunition will run out quickly. Note that SMGs don't have the stopping power of an assault rifle but it shouldn't matter unless you are fighting zombified military personnel and police who wear bulletproof vests.
Rifle: okay, but only at long range, and only if you can get consistent head shots. Also you a screwed if you have a bolt action verse a Fast Zombie.
Assault Rifle: Much better, make sure to reload often though, that full auto will dry out that ammo at all the wrong times (like when a zombie is stuffing your own arm up your ass).
Shotgun: The second best weapon for zombies, there buck shots will blow off the heads of several zombies, the person who is carrying a shotgun will survive most zombie outbreaks. Also makes you feel like a badass. It is only surpassed by...
Automatic shotgun: ...which is proven to deal with zombie groups of any size! Note, high recoil might send the user through a wall after 12 shots.
Large Minigun: will kill a lot of zombies, and is fun! Though whoever is using it will die just as his buddies got to relative safety.


melden

Survival guide

26.06.2013 um 04:08
duuude.. get a life


melden
Puschelhasi Diskussionsleiter
ehemaliges Mitglied

Link kopieren
Lesezeichen setzen

Survival guide

26.06.2013 um 14:19
@Darth_sweety

Du wirst schon sehen wer zuletzt lacht...muhahahahaharrrrr


melden